Putting Me Back Together Again

I knew I had to get back to my routine, I new it would be difficult, but the only way to get through the days ahead, was to get back on track.  I was doing so well attending my Pure Barre classes, I was feeling amazing and my body had kicked into fit mode.  Then one day {weeks ago} everything changed and honestly, I was terrified.  I was actually nervous to walk back into the place that I visited just about every day of the week.  The quaint studio down the street from my own home {where I pretty much knew everyone} suddenly became one of the scariest places for me.  The last time I had entered through the doors, I had broken down and found myself sobbing over the fact that we had just said goodbye to our son as he shipped of to the Army Rangers program.  I thought I was okay, apparently I was not.  I just couldn’t keep it together, I did stay and attempt to focus on class, but left after it was completed and I did not look back.  At least not until the other day …

I don’t know what it was that triggered the fire in me again, but I needed it and it was long past due.  I got dressed that morning for class, drove the kids to school and headed for Pure Barre.  “Just get to the parking lot”, was about as far as my head would let me get to.  I was there, back at the place that I loved going routinely to.  Reaching for the door and holding my head high {keeping it together}, I was all of the sudden inside.  Breathe in and breathe out, smile and embrace the safe place.

“Your Never Given Anything In This World That You Can’t Handle.  Be Strong And Just Keep Moving Forward”

I knew it was the right time when I was met with smiles, hugs and comments from my fellow “tuckees”.  The women, they were still there and they seemed to have missed me.  They “missed” me!  That was it, shocking.  I was missed?  I could feel the love and support as if it were seeping from the walls inside the studio.  I shared with them honestly and truthfully where I was and what kind of dark place I was finding myself going to.  I was dealing with some sort of short term depression, I felt it and owned it.  That was okay, I was not judged, but instead comforted.

Woman can be amazing.  Taking care of one another and just being supportive is a most priceless gift in life.  You don’t need to have a best friend, maybe you don’t have one at all.  Woman are universal, we need to hold one another up.  So many qualities are found in woman and if we are open to receiving love and grace, then we can give it back.

I have since been back to a few classes this past week and I am so happy.  I am on a slow climb back up the hill, but with every smile, hug, or wave, I know I can get there.  I am so grateful to be so connected to my body and mind.  If I weren’t, I don’t know where I would be heading.  I have managed to pull myself back up and continue to live the healthy lifestyle {mind, body and soul} as I only know how to.  Ladies, embrace one another, don’t judge, don’t criticize, don’t be harsh.  We ALL need comfort and support, we need to know that it’s okay to fall down no matter how old we are or how put together we may seem to be.  I am so grateful for the friends and connections I am making and have made via my classes.  Not only am I getting fit on the outside, I am being put back together again on the inside.

Peace …

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  1. Hi Linda, Just doing a bit of catch up on blog reading. Be sure to link in with other military mom groups. You might be surprised to find that there are support groups in your area. I’m a military spouse and I know that my mother-in-law is still connected with several groups of military moms. Also, I would recommend asking to be a part of his family readiness group (FRG) once he gets where he is going. It is a great way to remain in the loop and as a past FRG leader, I like to point out that those groups are not just for spouses! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions about how to get connected with military mom supports. It’s a journey you certainly do not have to go on alone. Hugs to you! And, congrats on hitting your new groove.
    Lisa @ Lisa Runs for Cupcakes recently posted…Where did Lisa go?My Profile

    • Thanks Lisa, I am so glad you shared your input. I am pretty up to date with our son’s platoon and page, so that helps a lot. Someone has started a support page for local families here and it is a growing process. I have an amazing friend {via the blog world} who’s hubby has been in Special Forces for years. She is my number one go to gal and connection. I find that writing about my new journey is also a way to not only document, but get those feelings out. Thank you so much. I appreciate you taking time for this post. xoxox
      Lynda recently posted…Putting Me Back Together AgainMy Profile

  2. This post is wonderful. I think it’s really important to find yourself and stay motivated within yourself, but also to find other women who support you and who want only happiness and success for you. I love when women empower other women, it’s such an amazing bond!
    Joanna recently posted…Makeup for MomsMy Profile

    • Joanna, thank you. I tend to get a bit nervous about just writing personal things, but this blog is meant to be real and share a lifestyle {as healthy as possible} wellness and mental health play a big factor in that. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts.

  3. Isn’t it true. Women can be your biggest supporters! I love that and I notice that my patients that have a strong support of women around them are the healthiest by far.
    Heather Denniston recently posted…Why These Four Supplements Are The Most EssentialMy Profile

  4. I love this. I love that they missed you and welcomed you back. I’m SO glad you went. I hope it helps and helps and helps, to have some of ‘your’ people around you.

    (Again, we write in kinda parallels today!)

    ((And I *really* need the fire to return to my soul, and for my butt to return to the gym, even though I have no-one there to welcome me))

    THANK YOU for your inspiration.
    Lizzi recently posted…Little Miss LonelyMy Profile

  5. It is so wonderful to have a good support group of women who support eachother!
    Heather Davis recently posted…Top 10 Free Kindle Books for TeensMy Profile

  6. Great motivation! Keep up the great work too!

  7. Your son’s bravery as well as yours is very admirable.
    Support is a wonderful thing and I’m glad you found comfort is what sounds like some great people.

  8. So glad that you’re beginning to feel more like yourself and that you took the big step of returning to the studio. I totally agree with you that sometimes a good sweat helps make us feel better in ways that we couldn’t anticipate. Thinking of you, Lynda. hugs!

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